Disclaimers: I do not own Weiss Kreuz or any of its characters. If

you see this fic and want to sue me the only thing you will get will

be my anime collection, cuz I have no money (

Author: Max Ikari

Pairings: Yohji/Aya, Schuldich/Aya

Warnings: NC-17, Lemon, non-consensual sex, violence, adult language,

etc.

[] Inner thoughts

/Mind talking/

The Devil's Own

Chapter 11

Dark cypresses-

The world is uneasily happy:

It will all be forgotten.

Theodore Storm

Clear

No pulse

# I wish my life had been different.

I wish I were dead…

Oniichan!

I want those earrings!

Aren't they a little bit much?

Not for me.

Oniichan I love you…

Aya I love you…

Would you forgive someone that betrayed you?

Depends on what they do…

Forget Weiss, forget Yohji, forget your past life. It has given you

nothing more than pure suffering. Start a new life, a new

existence. A life with me, with Schwartz…

I Can't…

Yes, you can Ran…

Aya…

Ran, what do you want to be when you grow up?

A banker, like my Otousan.

You are such a smart kid…

You are a cold bastard…

I am…

Who am I?

You are now Ran…

What is your name?

Aya…

You are my oniichan…

What's wrong?

Nothing.

You are cold…

Leave me alone!

I love you.

I love you.

Who do you love?

Do you miss them Ran?

No.

Kill him

I-I can't…

You have to hold on…

I am trying…

Do you want to live or die?

Live!

Liar!

Who are you?

Aya

Who is Ran?

My former self.

Then who are you now?

Aya!

You are an assassin.

I-I…

You are a killer, you kill for money.

You are a whore…

You are lying!

Balinese will hate you.

I love you, come back to me…

I don't know…

I am so confused…

Make up your mind!

I am just so tired…#

" Doctor there is still no pulse," said a nurse. " Should I declare

him dead?"

" Yes," said the doctor sadly. " We pronounce the subject dead at

8:35pm"

" Nooo!" screamed Yohji from outside the room. Yohji couldn't

believe that Aya was gone. Gone. That is such a definite word.

Just like forever.

In the back of his mind Yohji could hear Omi sobbing and Ken trying

to calm the younger boy. Yet, nobody was comforting him. The only

one that could do it was dead.

" Doc, he –he can't be dead," said Yohji. " You guys said it wasn't

a fatal injury."

" I know son," said the doctor with solemn eyes. " This things can't

be predicted. It's all up to the patient. Some people just give up."

" Aya didn't give up. He doesn't give up," said Yohji faintly

feeling wetness on his cheeks.

" I am really sorry," said the doctor before leaving to go check on

Aya again. Feeling for pulse, the doctor shaked his head sadly and

covered Aya's head with a white blanket.

Yohji felt his heart constrict when he saw the doctor covering Aya.

Aya was dead. He lost another person he loved. Maybe you cannot

break fate.

" Why didn't you tell me before?!" screamed Schuldich. The German

was practically tearing out of their house.

" Schuldich, he is already dead," said Crawford in a passive tone. "

There is nothing you can do for him anymore."

" Fuck you!" snapped Schuldich before storming out of the house. The

German was going to see Aya one last time. Nobody was going to stop

him, especially that pompous prick Crawford.

Somebody as cold-hearted as Crawford could never understand. I

love him. I love Aya.

" This is usually very hard for the families of the loved one," said

Doctor Kinomura. " I know what you are going through."

" I don't see…" snapped Yohji before Ken reached out to calm him down.

" We appreciate everything you have done for Aya," said Ken

quietly. " We just need some time to get used to the idea of Aya

being gone."

" It is hard but you will eventually learn how to deal," said Dr.

Kinomura.

" Doctor, doctor!" screamed a nurse. " The patient, he's...it's a

miracle."

" What's going on?" asked Dr. Kinomura visibly tired.

" The patient, Fujimiya, he's alive," said the female nurse. She was

visibly shaken.

" What?" said the Dr. before walking past the nurse toward Aya's room.

" We-we were taking everything off Mr. Fujimiya when Niko and I heard

an exhalation and then a quiet cough. Then Mr. Fujimiya woke up,

just like that. It was so unreal… I thought he was dead."

" I know…" mumbled Dr. Kinomura under his breath. Yohji, Ken, and

Omi were at the doctor's heels. Afraid that it was a kind of trick.

However, upon entering the room they saw a very alive Aya.

The Flower

I think I grow tensions

like flowers

in a wood where

nobody goes.

Each wound is perfect,

encloses itself in a tiny

imperceptible blossom,

making pain.

Pain is a flower like that one,

like this one,

like that one,

like this one.

Robert Creeley.

" Are you feeling okay Mr. Fujimiya?" asked Dr. Kinomura about the

fifth time. " It is just so strange…"

" I feel okay," said Aya quietly. Ever since he had awoken, Aya had

avoided all his teammates eyes and very much wanted to be alone.

Alone and away from accusing eyes. Away from Schwartz and Weiss.

Away from his own demons.

" Aya?" mumbled Omi afraid of saying anything more.

" I-I want to be alone," whispered Aya.

" What did you say?" asked DR. Kinomura leaning in to hear Aya.

" I want to be alone," repeated Aya with more emphasis this time.

" But Aya…" but Ken didn't get farther since Yohji stopped him.

" Let's go," said Yohji quietly before slipping out of the room.

Left alone and able to think, Aya realized he was afraid. Afraid of

the life he was living. Schuldich, Yohji, distractions that couldn't

let him breathe. With both of them, Aya felt as if he were

suffocating. He needed to get away from it all. Start all over

again.

Schuldich arrived at the hospital afraid of what he would find.

Afraid that the person he wanted to see, hold in his arms again would

be gone. Crawford had to be wrong, he had to be. People often made

mistakes. Walking toward the elevator, Schuldich searched the

building for Aya's mind and found it.

/Aya! /

/Aya answer me! Are you okay? /

However, Aya never answered back.

" What's wrong with Aya-kun?" asked Omi twisting the end of the shirt

between his hands.

" He just needs time. He just came out of a coma," said Yohji

quietly passing a hand through his hair.

" I know, but are you sure?" asked Ken. " Aya looked kind of weird

back there. He seemed almost afraid to see us."

" I know," answered Yohji. The blonde was thinking about the last

time Aya's behavior had been strange. That had been the week before

Aya left to be with Schwartz. One thing was for sure, Aya was lost

to him.

Turning toward Aya's room Yohji stopped short when he noticed the

telepath walking toward Aya's room.

" What are YOU doing here?" hissed Yohji through clenched teeth.

Schuldich looked worried and expression that startled Yohji.

Schuldich did not look in the mood to fight.

" I came to see how Aya is doing," said Schuldich defensively.

" He's okay for now…" said Yohji dangerously. " If you have come her

to hurt him…"

" Forget it Kudou. I am not in the mood," said Schuldich before

entering Aya's room.

Entering Aya's room Schuldich And Yohji noticed that the occupant was

fast asleep. The only sign that Aya was alive was the slow breathing.

" He is never going back to you," said Yohji quietly. " He has

suffered enough,"

" I know," said Schuldich quietly. The look Schuldich sported was

one of defeat and sadness. The telepath could see what Aya was

thinking and it filled him with a sense of helplessness. Aya looked

so vulnerable and pale that Schuldich cursed himself for inflicting

so much pain on him. /I am so sorry/

The telepath turned to gaze at Yohji and a faint smile played on his

lips. " Seems I have lost but so have you."

Yohji turned to watch the telepath. The blonde had failed to catch

what the German had mumbled. Something stirred in his line of vision

making him notice Aya once more.

" …I can't…" mumbled Aya in his sleep. Yohji leaned in to brush a

stray hair from Aya's forehead.

" Aya it's just a dream," said Yohji soothingly. Aya seemed to be

dreaming, what about Yohji didn't know. How much Yohji wished Aya

would open up to him, however, it seemed he had opened up more to

Schuldich.

" Actually he didn't," answered Schuldich quietly. The telepath

assumed the side of the bed that wasn't occupied by Yohji and

stretched his hand to touch the redhead.

/I am sorry, but I know you won't come back to me. Promise to come

back when you are ready. /

/…ready? /

" I have to go," said Schuldich getting up abruptly.

" You aren't staying?" asked Yohji out of curiosity.

" Going to miss me kitten?" said Schuldich with a wry smile. Yohji

ignored the comment getting up to leave.

" Aya is going to need you now. Take care of him," said Schuldich

before leaving the room. It struck Yohji that every time he saw the

German, the latter talked about Aya. Aya had gotten under his skin

as well. Giving the room a last glance Yohji walked away.

Remembering to forgive. Remember to pass beyond you into the day

On the wings of the secret you will never know.

Taking me from myself, in the path

Which the pastel girth of the day has assigned to me.

I prefer "you" in the plural, I want "you,"

You must come to me, all golden and pale

Like the dew and the air.

And then I start getting this feeling of exaltation.

John Ashbery, from " A Blessing in Disguise"

Aya woke up to the soft beeping of machines and a smell that he

recognized only too well. The smell reminded him of Aya and all the

mornings he had woken up besides her. A smell of sickness and

death. The final thought made him become wide-awake.

" Where?" grunted Aya surprised at the fear he was feeling.

" Good morning Mr. Fujimiya," said Dr. Kinomura. " I sent your

friends home, they have been here for the past two and a half days.

They needed some rest. So how are you feeling?"

" …okay…" whispered Aya trying to get his breathing under control.

" Your heart rate is a little too fast. Just relax," said Dr.

Kinomura soothingly. " Are you afraid of hospitals?"

" Nothing good ever came from a hospital," responded Aya. Dr.

Kinomura eyed him strangely. " So, can I leave?"

" I need to run some final tests and then you should be good to go,"

answered the Dr. with a small smile.

" Could you please not call my friends?" asked Aya.

" But they will want to hear from you," said Dr. Kinomura.

" I – I…please…" asked Aya quietly again.

" Okay, but give me a call back if you feel strange in any way,

okay?" said the Dr. Kinomura. Later a nurse brought Aya some

breakfast while they ran some tests on him. Dr. Kinomura said that

Aya seemed okay having only some minor complications because of his

sicknesses. Leaving the hospital, Aya breathed the fresh air

remembering what he had been thinking all day yesterday. Aya had

made up his mind; he was leaving Japan. Japan had taken away his

family, his innocence, and his life. Why stay in a place that only

brought him sorrow?

Walking toward a clothing store, Aya bought a pair of jeans, a blue

sweater and blue baseball cap. Walking toward the bank, he took his

passport and money deciding on taking the first plane available out

of the country.

Arriving at the airport, Aya searched for the men's room and changed

his clothes. By the time Aya came out of the stall he looked like a

nineteen-year-old jockey.

" A one way ticket to Boston, USA," said Aya in a cheery tone of

voice.

" Boston? One moment please," said the desk clerk. " There is a seat

available. It leaves at 3:45pm and the cost is 2725 USD."

" Okay, I will take it," said Aya smiling at the girl. The girl

blushed slightly and returned to her typing.

" That will be 2725 dollars Mr…"

" Sanuske," said Aya. " Miko Sanuske."

" Okay. Thanks a lot and have a nice flight," said the attendant.

That gave Aya about twenty minutes before the plane left. He was

feeling a little guilty of leaving but he had to leave. For his own

sanity. Walking to a phone he dialed the apartment.

* Ohayo, this is Omi!" answered Omi. *

" O-Omi?" asked Aya uncertain.

* Aya-kun! Are you okay? The doctor said he would call us once you

woke up. I just got up myself. *

" I'm fine. Could you I speak to Yohji?" asked Aya quietly.

* Sure! Yohji its Aya! *

* Aya are you okay? Asked Yohji once he got on the phone *

" Yeah, I –I am just calling to say… I am not coming back," said Aya

trying to keep his voice under control.

* You are leaving? Where? Why? * asked Yohji quietly.

" I –I can't deal with my life right now Yohji. I don't know what to

think…" said Aya rapidly. " I am sorry."

* Liar * answered Yohji. * You are a coward, afraid of living life.

You have been dead since the day your sister was lost to you. *

" Good bye Yohji," said Aya and hung up the phone. He could still

hear Yohji in the background telling him not to go.

TBC