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Chandler: Yeah, I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.

Chandler: See, I wrote a note to myself, and then I realised I didn't need it, so I balled it up and...now I wish I was dead.

Chandler: Ew, ew, ew, ew ew ew ew ew!

Monica: What?

Chandler: Ugly Naked Guy got a Thighmaster!

Rachel: Has anybody seen my engagement ring?

Phoebe: Yeah, it's beautiful.

Ross: Carol's pregnant.

Monica: W-w-wh-... wha-... w-w-w-...

Ross: Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now.