Colours of My Life

Author: Sardius

Category: Romance/Angst

Warnings: NC-17

Pairings: Yohji/Aya(Ran)

Disclaimer: I don't own Weiss Kreuz; it belongs to its creator and company. (Sobs) if only they were mine…. sniff sniff

Author's Note: Here's the very very late chapter everyone. Sorry for the late post. I know I was meant to update this a long time ago but RL has kept me busy and also many other things. Hope you enjoy this chapter, and warning, its sad.

Thanks to my betas Soulfire and Lilla.

Character's Thoughts

Chapter Thirteen: Fallen

"Once Siberian and me head of to the labs, Abyssinian and you will kill the target here. Then we have exactly fifteen minutes to get out of the building before it collapses. My assumption is, Schwarz will also be there tonight, so keep a lookout."

I tried to absorb all the information the chibi is telling me, however a part of me was already worried about Aya's safety. If only the stubborn fool would listen to me so then I can focus on this mission alone.

I'll rather die with you.

It had been comforting to know how Aya had felt about me. I could not help but feel a sense of happiness blooming inside my heart as I remembered the moment when he had whispered the words I so desperately wanted to hear.

Ashiteru.

A hand slid into mine as I looked down to see Aya shifted his head towards me, wondering if I was okay. I squeezed his hand to reassure him that everything was fine and brushed the soft strands of crimson hair away from his face as I tried to capture this beautiful face into my memory.

I feel as though something is going to happen to you Aya. If only there was a way for you to understand why I want you to stay here tonight.

Yet, once Aya had made his decision; there was no way to stop him. Omi and Ken were partially surprised when the redhead came downstairs to the mission room, dressed in his assassin gear, but one look at my direction told them not to say anything.

"Right then. We'll depart in about ten minutes. Yohji will take his seven with Aya, Ken and I will take the bike. We'll meet at the place in about half an hour. Is that clear?"

Omi continued to give us various directions while Ken and I nodded, Aya, of course, didn't say anything, but I could tell he was trying not to show how nervous he was. I could feel the occasional tremble in his body and yet, all I wanted to do, was to drag Aya inside the room, to prevent him from coming with us.

"Yohji. Can I have a word with you?"

I blinked and realized the chibi was speaking to me and I felt Aya stiffening slightly. I tried to sound casual as I gave him another squeeze with my hand and let him go. "Sure thing Omi. Anything you say."

I knew what the kid was going to ask. I left Aya with Ken by themselves in the mission room and went upstairs towards the kitchen and shut the door. Great. Might as well get this over and done with. Omi followed behind me, the kid had not uttered another word until I had shut the door.

"Yohji. You know what this mission means to Weiss tonight."

Of course chibi. If only I could have convinced Aya.

"I know."

"You can't possibly let Aya-kun come with us. It's far too dangerous. Plus, we both know Schwarz is going to be there tonight and there is no way he can…."

Defend himself you mean.

Omi wasn't able to finish his sentence. I knew how hard it was for him to raise this topic in the first place. Even if Aya had had his eyesight back, fighting with Schwarz was already a dangerous mission, let alone letting him go without the ability to see his opponent. How was he able to fight like he is now? An inner part of me was worried about this problem, but Aya seemed to know what he was doing. Then again, this was Aya. The guy could be as stubborn as hell.

I remembered seeing the redhead, broken in front of me, as he cried in my arms so many times. It had hurt to see someone as strong as Aya to be so vulnerable all of a sudden. I tried to swallow up my anger as I thought about the bastard that did this to him.

I will make you pay Schuldig. You have my life on it.

"He won't listen kiddo. You know how stubborn the prick can be and if we tell him to stay here, he'll just ignore us. Not to mention the fact that he will probably find some other ways to come, which makes matters worst."

But inside my heart, I already knew why Aya had wanted to come with me.

"I understand Yohji-kun. But... please be careful." Omi looked up at me with a tinge of sadness in his eyes. I knew the kid was trying to help, despite how things had turned out between the team. I grabbed the kid close towards me and gave him a hug as I ruffled his hair.

"Don't worry chibi. I will look after him. He's too stubborn to die anyway."

There is no way I would let someone I love so much die in front of my eyes again. The stubborn fool won't die tonight.

I won't let him.

* * * * * *

I heard the shuffle of feet departed and I realized Yohji had gone off to talk to Omi. I knew what they were talking about and yet I had no intention to interrupt them. I only wanted this night to be over. I only wanted Yohji to be with me forever.

Is that too much to ask?

"Aya?"

I recognized Ken's voice and could tell how uncomfortable he was at not knowing what to say to me. I nodded my head and slowly felt my way along the wall as I decided to wait for Yohji outside, where he parked his seven.

"Where are you going?"

"Out." I didn't mean to snap at Ken. But for some reason, I wanted to be away from this room. I needed time to think to myself before Yohji and I headed off to the mission.

I knew how much Yohji had not wanted me to go tonight. But I couldn't. I couldn't leave him, knowing who he might be facing. Schwarz. At least...at least if anything happened, I would die with him. I didn't think I could handle being by myself if anything was to happen to Yohji.

I remembered the times when Shion had taught me the skills of mastering the blade. He had said, the skill comes from the heart. To know your opponent, one can see them in his mind. These lessons were always valuable to me ever since I had become an assassin. To seek out your opponents, you must listen to their movement, smell their scents, and the ability to know what their next move is. These skills became a part of subconscious since I had joined my first team as part of Kritiker.

"Aya."

I stiffened and heard Yohji's voice behind me. I didn't even notice he was there with his soft footsteps treading silently towards me. He didn't say anything, but I could feel the warmth of his body close by, then slowly I felt myself being wrapped gently in his arms as he whispered huskily in my ear.

"Are you all right?"

I leaned back slightly against him, feeling his arms tightening around me possessively as I wished we could be like this forever. It seemed like an eternity before the blonde loosened his arms around me and shifted me around so I could feel he was facing me.

"Aya." He took my hand again and I felt the soft kisses he placed on my fingertips. "Do you still want to go through with this?" There was a hint of desperation in his voice and for one second, I had thought of staying here and letting Yohji go. But I couldn't. Knowing he was there by my side rather than waiting in a room and not knowing what had happen to him would be a far worse feeling than I could have thought.

"Yes. I'm sure."

He didn't ask anymore and we stood there in silence until I felt a pair of lips descended on my own. It was warm, soft, and it tasted like Yohji. The kiss was gentle, a shy brush of his lips, a flickering of the tongue and it ended. I felt the cool breeze on my cheeks as I stood there, wondering what Yohji was thinking. I wished I could see what he looked like now. But these thoughts vanished when I felt his lips brushing gently on my forehead and he whispered, "Love you Aya. Whatever happens tonight, we'll always be together. I won't let you leave me."

I felt like this was the last time before it was our death. Part of me should have felt nervous for going to the mission, but there was only this sense of numbness. A feeling I could not explain. I felt the rough hand that belonged to Yohji as he led me to his seven. Then, before I knew it, I could hear the start of the engine and we were off.

Yohji didn't say anything as he drove, letting the silence settle over us.

However, his hand never left mine.

* * * * * * * *

The telepath smirked as he got up from his chair and lingered to play with his crimson lock. Tonight his kitten would show up. No doubt about that and, oh yes, he sure was going to have fun messing with his mind before killing him. Then again, killing him won't be worth it. Maybe tormenting him and that playboy would be amusing.

"Schuldig. It's time. Let's go."

Schuldig stretched. He flicked the back of his hair and made sure he had his gun ready in his jacket. Things sure would be interesting tonight, what with Weiss being there also. Already the redhead had thought about all the things he could play with that beautiful fucked up mind.

"Oh yes, Fujimiya. You won't escape me this time. And your little boy friend won't be able to protect you either."

// I'll make sure he'd be dead. //

* * * * * *

"Aya?"

The redhead didn't say anything as he stood there with a blank look on his face. Almost suddenly he jerked away from me when my hand touched his shoulder, a hint of panic shown on his pale face.

"You okay?"

It took a moment for Aya to reply to me. There was definitely something wrong with him, the way he was shivering beside me, his fist gripping the hilt of his katana tightly. Knowing the redhead was probably nervous about seeing the bastard again, I didn't say anything but unclenched the fingers in his fist, hoping to reassure him I was there.

Ken and Omi had arrived shortly after us. Already a dreaded silence had settled over us as we move to our initial position, waiting for the target to show up.

"Balinese. Abyssinian. Target is reaching the second floor. There are guards up in the ground and first level."

I adjusted my headphone and spoke back. "Got it kiddo." I glanced around out of our hiding and saw the guards standing outside the front door. I repeated my observation to Aya, who nodded silently and waited to see what other instruction he would be receiving.

"Siberian and I will take care of the other guards. You and Abyssinian will take down the target on the first floor. Is everything okay over there?"

I could hear Aya grunt beside me, knowing that Omi was probably asking if he was capable of taking care of himself. "Understood. Everything is fine. When you're ready."

"Affirmative."

I glanced over once more to see where our target was. Our mission tonight was to kill the man responsible for the drugs used on victims during various nightclubs. Apparently, the drug could knock the person unconscious for twenty-four hours or worst put into a coma. Weiss had been assigned to investigate the drug and to kill the target responsible for it. I gritted my teeth as my fingers skimmed over my watch, the wires flickering back and forth.

Any minute now.

I had discussed with Aya how we were going to do this. I would go and kill the target, while he would try to stop the guards coming for us. Knowing Aya wouldn't be able to see, I prayed that by telling him where his opponents were would help us get through this mission alive.

"Target is spotted."

Aya raised his head towards me. I smiled even though I knew he couldn't see it, but I took his hand in mine again and squeezed them gently.

"Let's go."

I raced out of our hiding; my hands never left Aya's as I felt him behind me. Praying to God that this night would end soon, I had to concentrate at making sure the redhead didn't fall and that I wasn't going too fast. Losing blindness, meant losing the sense of balance. I tried to make sure Aya was keeping up with my footsteps, as I saw the guards running towards us.

"Two on your left, one on your right. Stay back to back behind me."

I could hear the sharpening of Aya's katana coming out of its case. Yet already I was too preoccupied to notice anything else, except the redhead standing behind me, getting ready to strike the guards down and the target just a few steps away.

* * * * * * *

It was difficult trying to find my sense of balance when I was trying to catch up with Yohji's movement. I knew the blonde was looking out for me, the way how he was slowing down his steps, telling me when to stop, where my opponents were. I was grateful for that, but I also didn't want to rely on him on everything else. I didn't want to become his burden.

"Two on your left, one on your right."

I shifted my shades on my nose and grabbed the hilt of my katana in both hands. Yohji had thought it was best not to let people know about my inability to see. I didn't argue with him. It was for the best after all.

I felt the shift of the winds, the movement of someone just slightly on my left. A moment of calmness and I charged, slashing at the target closest to me.

Focus on the sound, the smell, and the movement in their steps.

I ducked as I felt one of the guards slashed his weapon in front of me. A few strands of my hair seemed to be cut off. I shove my katana into his gut, hearing the blood spilling onto the floor and the cracking of his ribs as I twisted my katana in a vicious jerk.

"Behind you!"

Hearing Yohji's warning, I swung my blade backwards, slicing someone in the ribs, the tear of the flesh could be heard as I wretched the hilt back and pushed the victim away, hearing the body slump onto the ground. I felt the blonde's back touching me; his breathing was harsh as he touched my hand again. It was wet; I guessed it must be the target's blood.

"You okay?"

I nodded.

"Bombay. Target is killed. Meet outside in five minutes."

I tried to adjust to my senses again; the smell of blood was evident on my blade as were the bodies around us. Yohji took my hand again and started to make our way outside, but suddenly a voice echoed in both of our heads and I felt my body turned cold with fear.

// Still alive are you, my kitten? A pity. I would have thought I had taken care of you the last time. Isn't it sweet that you got your pretty boyfriend to protect you now? //

"Schuldig." I could hear Yohji's voice snarling back at him.

// Seems like the kitty has teeth. Shall we see how good he can fight back? //

// Or do you want to be the one responsible for his death? Another death to add to yoursins. //

No. A sudden image flashed through my mind with Yohji lying dead beside me, a pool of blood forming at my feet. I cringed at the thought, knowing once again, the bastard is just playing with my mind. I let go of Yohji's hand and placed them at the hilt of my katana.

"Stay away from him," I snarled.

The blonde was probably wondering what had gone wrong between the telepath and me. I heard a small chuckle as I gritted my teeth and charged forward. Wanting to kill the German so desperately and to give my life away rather than letting Yohji die.

* * * * * * *

"Aya."

What the heck does he think he is doing?

I grabbed the redhead close towards me, trapping him with my left arm while my other hand had the wire strung after the German. Schuldig smiled, a hint of amusement in his eyes as he took a step back, letting the wire grasped the thin air. I glanced around to see if the other members of Schwarz were there, but so far there was no one present except for the bastard in front of me.

"Yohji! Are you and Aya all right?"

I cursed as I realized Omi was speaking to me through the headphone with a slight panic in his voice. Aya tried to shift away from my grip as I tightened my arms around him. Damn that stubborn idiot. There was no way he could possibly fight the telepath in his condition. What part of his mind didn't he understand?

''I'm okay. Have Aya beside me. Be careful."

I shut the communication off and glared at my enemy.

"Yohji. Let go off me."

"Don't be a idiot Aya, and let me take care of it."

"No!"

Aya grabbed onto my arm, his nails digging into my skin and I winced in pain. I could tell he was nervous with Schuldig standing before us, the telepath already advancing closer to us by the second.

// Such a possessive bastard, aren't you Balinese. //

"Shut the fuck up, mastermind, and let's just get this over with."

I gritted my teeth and pulled Aya behind me, urging him to get out of the way.

// So much love directed between the two of you, it's a pity that it won't last much longer.//

Aya's head snapped up and snarled at Schuldig. "Leave Yohji out of it. You just want me dead, isn't it? Then go ahead and kill me then."

"What's the point in doing that? Besides, it's more fun watching you suffer this way…. Ran."

Aya flinched at his real name, and I pushed him out of the way, swunging my wire out. The telepath was too damn fast and I had to duck at the fist coming my way before his gun came aiming towards me. The sound of the bullet echoed in the room, as I rolled over, noticing the slash of pain on my shoulders where the bullet grazed my skin.

// Too bad there is no one else to help you Kudou.//

I swore, hearing the loud crackle of the katana thrown onto the floor as Schuldig had his arm wrapped around Aya's waist, his gun resting on his temple. Fuck. Schuldig smirked, his gun raised to shoot me again as I ran across the room, my footsteps could be heard loudly on the concrete floor. Racing behind a column, I leaned against it to catch my breath and swore when I heard the telepathic voice speaking to me.

// If you don't come out on the count of three, then say good bye to your little kitten. //

// Ein //

"Yohji just go!"

Fuck! I could hear Aya cursing at the German, then yelped in pain as I tried to remain control and not get both of us killed. Holding onto my watch tightly, I mentally cursed myself and held my breath.

// Zwei //

I looked over to see Aya struggling against the German, but by now, the telepath had his hand wrapped around the younger man's neck, stopping him from moving anymore, the tip of the gun digging into his skin.

// Drei //

I saw the chance when Aya knocked the gun aside, his elbow shoving forcefully into Schuldig. But the German snarled and smashed the redhead's face with the end of his handgun, trapping the younger man with his arm. You fucking bastard. Swiftly, I dashed out into the opening, my arm stretched forward as I rolled across the ground, my wire wrapped tightly around his throat, stopping him from moving.

"Fuck off, Schuldig and let go of Aya now."

I tightened the wire in my grip, a line of blood was formed along the telepaths neck as he smirked and pulled Aya harder beside him. The redhead winced in pain, a slight bruise was formed on his face where he was hit, his hands clung onto the German's arm, desperately trying to get out of his grip.

// What makes you think I would let him go? //

"Yohji, forget me, just hurry up!" The harsh voice brought me back from my anger as I saw Aya in pain, leaning slightly on the telepath, his legs were able to support himself.

"No! Don't you fucking dare do this to me Aya!"

// Choose Yotan. You want to kill me or do you want your precious Ran to die? //

"Shut up!" For one moment there, all I saw was red. Everything else faded out except for Schuldig and me. I wanted to kill the bastard right then and there, for everything he had done, for hurting Aya. He choked; I could see the bruises starting to form on his neck. However, he never let go of Aya, instead he jerked the younger man's head back as he yelped in pain.

"Do it, Yohji."

Aya's voice was cut off when the sound of a gun was heard, as he fell onto the floor gasping for breath. I glanced up to see the American standing before me. His eyes never left the telepath.

"Schuldig, I told you to get the hell out of here a few minutes ago. Esset has no need of Weiss any longer. Our business here is finished. Let's go."

The German staggered to his feet, a trail of blood was seen around his neck as he glared dangerous at me.

// Fuck Esset. You are going to hell Kudou. //

"A bit late for that now Brad. I was just about to prove to the kitten how wrong he is."

Before I knew what was happening I saw the telepath raising his gun towards Aya. Without any warning whatsoever, I flung myself on top of Aya and wrapped his body in my arms.

The sound of the gunfire was heard and my vision was blinded by intense pain as I gasped and tightened my arms around him, biting hard on my lips until I was drawing blood.

Dimly I heard the precog shouted something at the German and the sound of the fallen gun was smashed onto the floor. I raised my head to look up wearily, my vision blurring slightly as I noticed there was no one there. It seemed like Schwarz and the bastard had gone and for now, Aya was safe. Aya was safe.

"Yohji?"

Aya's voice brought me back to the present, but all I could do was smile and slowly lay my head down on his chest, looking at the pool of blood forming on the ground. Everything hurt so much at the moment and all I wanted to do was curl up with my lover and wished all this was a dream.

* * * * * * *

The breath was knocked out of me as I felt Yohji's body collapsing on top of mine. I clutched onto the blonde's shoulders, my hands shaking slightly as I wondered if he was all right.

"Yohji?"

There was no reply, only the soft breathing I could feel against my ear. I heard someone calling me, but all I could focus was the pitch-blackness that surrounded me, and the beating of Yohji's heart slowly fading away. I shook him harder.

"Yohji!" There was still no reply. I spoke a bit louder, my voice slightly hoarse by the tears slowly seeping into my eyes. "Yohji", I pleaded. Then in a more gentle whisper I pleaded, "Answer me…. please."

I could feel his movement as his body shuffled on top of me, but his breath was harsh, as if he was gasping in pain. A cold hand touched my cheeks, gently brushing the crimson hair away from my face, wiping my tears away.

His hands were wet and the smell of blood drifted into me. I wanted to ask him if he was all right, but I was cut off when Yohji spoke quietly to me, "Hey…its okay. It…It was just a little scratch, nothing drastic, don't worry love."

I cried as I grabbed him tightly towards me, I didn't know what I was doing. I just clung onto him, wishing to the Gods, that they wouldn't take him away from me. I sobbed uncontrollably, my tears washing away with his blood, as I felt it soaked onto his coat and staining onto my fingers.

"Don't lie to me, don't you fucking dare lie to me."

His lips slowly brushed against mine, it was soft, yet slightly rough, I could taste the blood on his skin. "I'm too stubborn to die…argh…love. I pro…promised you, didn't I? That I would never leave you."

"Then don't. Don't leave me all alone. Oh God, Yohji, stay with me."

I tightened my hold onto his shoulders, I never, never wanted to see someone I loved hurt ever again. And here I was holding someone so precious to me, letting him slowly seep away from my grasps. Letting them once again leave me alone to face this world.

I won't let him. I won't let him leave me.

"Aya?" Yohji's voice was fading away; so much pain was inflicted upon him and I could feel him struggling as he spoke to me, "Promise me you'd continue living."

Those words made my blood turn cold, knowing what they mean to him as he said this. I… No. I won't! Don't make me Yohji. Don't make me. I want to die with you. He gripped onto me with a bruising force; I was surprised there was still so much strength in him as I winced in pain.

"Pro…promise me…. please love?"

Then I felt him lay down on top of me until his lips brushed against my ear and asked me again. Tears continued to pour out of my eyes, sliding down my cheeks as I whispered back to him, the words I would regret. "Yes…"

Yohji chuckled beside me and shifted his lips so it rested on my forehead. "…Then everything will be okay. I love you Ran…."

And his voice was gone.

Everything seemed to fade away until all I could feel was the burning pain in my heart. I couldn't breath, I couldn't see, only the darkness that would forever envelop me. The tears wouldn't stop flowing as I gasped for air.

"Yohji?" I cried.

Please Yohji, wake up for me. I shook him again.

"Yohji??!!!"

I shook him once more and still he wasn't moving. No voices. Nothing. He wasn't speaking to me anymore. I shook him even harder till I was crying out his name over and over again. The silence was overwhelming to the point where I could concentrate on waking up Yohji. I wanted to hear his voice again. I wanted to know he was still alive beside me. I wanted to know!

As much as I tried, there were still no responses. And realization struck through me as I clung onto his body, the only thing that matters to me and I screamed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

TBC~~~~~